The Desecration of ED-209

Hey guys, it's Donnie...I'm not one to jump on the bandwagon when it comes to bashing Hollywood for their copious amount of remakes and TV adaptations, but sometimes a project comes along that just.....makes me sad.

Sony and producer Michael De Luca have decided to bring back Robocop. ROBOCOP!! Are you kidding me?? Look, I'll grant you that the technology has come a long way since 1987 and I'm sure that there's massive potential to make Robocop really "cool." But at the same time, that's kind of what I'm afraid of. Granted Sony and De Luca tend to have a much better track record when it comes to these sort of things, but I'm getting visions of Robocop being treated like Fantastic Four and turning out....well, boring.

Robocop is one of those movies that almost cannot be replicated. So many things had to come together to make that film what it was. The specific time it was made and the level of effects at that point, Peter Weller-face, Ronnie Cox in the executive bathroom, Miguel Ferrer snorting lines off a hooker's tits, and Red Foreman in terrorist mode. Plus, most importantly, Paul Verhoeven in the director's chair. Verhoeven is such a complete nutball that only he could have made Robocop into the ultra-violent, dystopian, futuristic monstrosity (and I mean that in a good way) that it was, and you'll never be able to recapture that spirit. More importantly, you'll never find a director as totally whacked as Verhoeven.

Look, I'd LOVE to see Robocop brought back to the big screen and rule everyone, but we're no longer living in the world where you could sort of get away with anything in a movie. The majoirty of studio films are so watered down and over-processed that I just have very little faith in Robocop getting done right. I'd hope Sony proves me wrong, but honestly, it's all gonna come down to who's writing and who's directing.

Until we find that out, then my answer is sadly "No. I would not buy that for a dollar."